Saturday, June 16, 2007

My Testimony

Tomorrow is Father's Day. It seems that that day is usually kind of hard for me. After my dad's accident things have never been the same. I have learned to appreciate what I have, while I have it: ) I decided that for those of you reading my blog, if you havent ever heard part of my testimony, that I would post it on here. I hope that if you choose to read it, that you are challenged to not take things for granted. Let those you love, know you love them! : ) Thanks for your prayers and the emails! They are appreciated!
*MY TESTIMONY*
Have you ever had something that happened to you that changed your life forever, it may have happened in just a moment, or even over a long period of time, but the final outcome changed your life, well two summers, while at camp, my life did just that. There were many aspects of my life that changed, some in quite a short period of time, but also a few over a long period of time. It all started back in March of 2005, when one of my co-workers, whom had once been a counselor at camp when I was a camper, told me that she was going to go back to camp and was going to spend the whole summer counseling. She told me that I should consider counseling also, because they always need help, and that it would just be great to be back out at camp. I believe that God has called me into missions, and have been trying to do missions work these last couple of summers, and at that time I didn’t have a trip planned for this last summer, and so I thought maybe having this coworker talk to me about an opportunity to serve at camp was God’s way of telling me that Camp Witness was where He wanted me to be this summer, and now as I look back, Camp Witness was exactly where He wanted me to be! My original plan was to spend two weeks counseling at camp, and then return home, but another window of opportunity opened up, and they asked me to come back to counsel for another week, to which I gladly accepted their offer, not knowing at the time, that that would be the week that would dramatically change my life forever.
It was the second to last week of camp, and this particular week we had mainly junior high kids, being that there was a basketball clinic going on. Because of the age of the campers, we were able to show Nooma videos during the Bible class times, and had discussions that would directly follow these short films. Nooma videos are about an average of 11 minutes each, yet within that short time, the creator of the films, Rob Bell, is able to discuss many of the challenges life presents, and what the best way is to respond to them. His messages are quite clear, and really require some thought. I remember, that one day we watched one of his movies called, “Luggage” and in this film the main message is that we need to be taking every opportunity to attend to the needs of others, and we need to do it now, because we are not guaranteed tomorrow. Well, in the end of this film there is a woman who is killed in a car accident, the point is illustrated that we need to be living each day as though it were our last, because again we are not guaranteed tomorrow. That short little film, really touched my heart, it really challenged me, it made me think of a few friends that I knew I needed to talk to, and it also made me appreciate my family and all of the things that I have. The next day, while in game time, out at the ball diamond, I received a phone call telling me that my father and my brother had been in a car accident. At first, they told me that is wasn’t too serious, they said that my brother was fine, but that my dad had a severely broken arm, and some cuts, but nothing to serious. As the afternoon progressed, more and more little, but serious details started to come in, I found out that my dad had hit a semi head on, and then about 2 hours after I received the first phone call telling me that there had been an accident, I received one last phone call, a call that I will never forget, it was the call that told me that my dad hadn’t made it through the accident. At just 56 years of age, my father was killed in a car accident, and although I knew where my dad was, because he had chosen to accept Jesus Christ as his Savior at a very young age, it was still hard for me to understand God’s reasoning. I quickly learned that although we don’t always understand, God’s timing is perfect. Being out at camp, when the accident happened literally saved my life, I was actually supposed to be with my dad teaching some college students how to start Bible studies, but I had told my dad that I was going to be counseling at camp, and wouldn’t be able to go with him, so my being at camp was all part of God’s perfect timing and perfect plan; it also made me realize that God isn’t quite done with me yet!J Another way camp played a major role in my life this last summer, was the relationships that I was able to build. Before I left for camp for the first 2 weeks, my dad had told me that he was going to be praying that I would find great Christian friends, who would be able to not only hold me accountable, but to also encourage me; that was also a prayer of mine as well, and while at camp, God answered that prayer. I was able to build some wonderful friendships with many of my fellow counselors, relationships that have changed my life forever. After the accident had happened, if I hadn’t been out at camp, I wouldn’t have really had any friends to turn to, but because I was at Camp Witness, and because I had developed these relationships, all the counselors were right there with me. I can honestly say, that if it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have been able to handle that particular obstacle in the way that I did. I love each and every one of the counselors, and I am truly appreciative to them for everything that they have done for me.
The Nooma video that I would’ve watched the day after the accident, had I been at camp, was one called “Rain”. In this film, Rob Bell is talking about how God will never leave us, and that although He can put storms in our lives, He knows the way home, and that He loves us enough to help us through them. I actually watched that video about a week after the accident, I just sat there amazed at the message. I, felt as though God was talking directly to me, through this video. It was at that point that I was again reminded , that although I may not understand God’s timing, He isn’t ever going to leave me, and that He is right here by my side, holding me tight, telling me that we are going to get through this.

God used Camp Witness to prepare my heart for His plans for my life. I look back now and I am quite amazed at how intricate God’s timing and planning can be, it is just so perfect. I wouldn’t change a thing about my summer, although there are times that I wish my dad was here, I do know that he is in a better place, and I also know that God put this trial in my life for a reason. He used camp to help not only prepare my heart for what happened, but He also used the people at camp to help keep all the pieces of my heart together. James 1:2-4, it says, “ Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Although, I know that I will continue to face trials of many kind all throughout my life, I know that because of Camp Witness, and the relationships I built there, I was able to face that particular trial in my life, and that I will now have the strength and support to do all things through Christ who will be there to give me that strength. This last summer changed my life forever, and yet although some things were harder to deal with than others, I know that God was right there behind it all guiding me and helping me fulfill His plan for my life. Someone once said, “God guides us, He leads us step by step, from event to event. Only afterwards, as we look back over the way we have come…do we experience the feeling of having been led without knowing it, the feeling that God has mysteriously guided us.” God not only used Camp Witness to prepare heart for His plans, but He also used camp to bring me closer to Him.


Here is a song that I wrote:
God, Can you hear me now?
Sometimes I take control, but then I seem to lose it
When things seem to be going right,
I close my eyes, and to my surprise,
my world is falling apart, it is tearing at my heart..
God, can you hear me now, I need to know now,
what to do, what to do, what to do with my life…?
I am at a loss for words, I’ve never felt like this before…
if only I could give it up, then everything would turn around;
I want your will for my life, You say you know the plans that you have for my life,
please help me to see, that you are ALL I need,
please help me to stand strong, and against all wrong…
God, can you hear me now, I need to know now what to do, what to do, what to do with my life…?
Whenever I let you be in my life, everything goes just right, teach me to wait, before it is too late,
help me to hang on, though the wait may be long,
with you by my side, I’ll never collide…
God, can you hear me now, I need to know now what to do, what to do, what to do with my life…?
I am faced with a decision, it’s all up to me,
do I call on Thee, or do I hold it all in, and face it all alone, or do I let it go, let you take control;
the choice is mine, I want to let my light shine so, …
God, can you hear me now, I need to know now what to do, what to do, what to do with my life…?

1 comment:

VonnieLeeMoore said...

I found your story to be very touching--God is definitely leading in your life. We will keep you in our prayers. Vonnie and Don Moore