Wow! It has been so long since I have blogged. I have had several people ask me what is going on, and well life has just been happening. It always seems that I want to blog, but yet do not have time to do it. Well, today, I got up early and took a friend to the airport, and decided that instead of going back to sleep, that I would take advantage of being awake and pour my heart into my blog. I hope you are ready for this, because this is going to be quite an intricate blog. I hope to be quite honest about all things going on in my life. I have not blogged since last March..thus I have about 7 months to fill you in on! I'm currently sitting outside, in 50degree weather, with a blanket wrapped around me and a cup of coffee sitting by my side..so, I'll pause here and let you go get a cup of coffee so that you can sip on some coffee goodness while you read about all that the Lord is and has been doing in my life. . .
Here is a quick overview of the last 7 months, and I will go more in depth on things I feel have been significant :
March-May- I was finishing up my semester at Grace University, and continued to work at HyVee.
May-August- I enjoyed the summer, with a few trips up to Wisconsin to see Alex, and continued to work at HyVee.
August- I began my last semester of my college career! : ) Woohoo! Alex and I decided to end our relationship. I started helping with an English conversation class and still worked at HyVee. I also went on a 4,400 mile roadtrip in my little black car with 2 friends! We went through SD, WY, MT, ID, WA, OR, UT, CO, IA, NE---it was an amazingly fun trip filled with lifelong memories!!
September-October- Still school, work, class, and just living!
(The pictures below are from our roadtrip halfway across America) :)
This is Todd, Lindsey, and I in Portland, Oregon. Lindsey (my roommate) and I drove to out to the west coast, and ended up having Todd ( a teammate from our Mali EDGE team) ride back with us to Nebraska! Todd grew up in Oregon, and so we were able to meet some of his family, and he planned a few days of our trip in Oregon..we were able to go to the Pacific Ocean during our time in OR.
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Ok!! So here we go, life for me these days has been extremely busy. I just keep telling myself that it is only for this chapter in life that I will be as busy as I am. My week begins on Mondays with classes starting in the morning and ending at 9pm. Tuesdays, I work at the coffee shop at school, then have class, and then work at HyVee at night. Wednesdays, I have classes in the morning and afternoon, and then help with an English Conversation Class at Christ Community Church, in Omaha, NE. Thursdays, I work in the coffee shop at school, and then have classes until 10pm (one class being in Elkhorn, NE- which is about a 30 minute drive from where I live) Then, comes Friday and Saturday- I work both days and try to find time in there to do some homework or spend time with friends! Sundays, I also work, and have church in the evening! So, with all that said, my life is quite busy right now...I'm trying to find the balance- how to make time for my roommate, and minister to my friends, yet pay my bills and finish up my LAST semester of college!! It has been a struggle, especially as of late!
Hmm.. Well, my classes this Fall have been going quite well! I am having a hard time keeping up with my online class, but seem to be doing okay in my other classes. I keep telling myself I need to perservere, because this IS my last semester!! : ) I have been taking a class at Metro Community College on Thursday nights, and that will be done in Novemeber, which will free up one night for me..I am looking forward to that! All of my other Grace classes will be done on December 10th! So, basically I have 2 months of college left! Can I get a "WOOHOO?" : )
Just this last month I got promoted at HyVee and I am now an assistant manager! I am in training now, and am loving every minute! I started working for HyVee in May of 2001, and have always wanted to pursue management, and have now been given a chance! Although, along with this opportunity comes alot of responsibility and expectations, thus I am working atleast 32 hours week, which is actually proving to turn itself into about 36 hours or so..thus, work is keeping me really busy! They have told me that after I finish with my classes in December, if I'd like to go fulltime, that will probably be a possibility! Which will potentially help with paying off school loans! : ) So, we will see what happens in the months to come...I never thought that I'd stay with HyVee as long as I have, but God continues to open doors for me at HyVee and so I cannot get away! HyVee just has a special place in my heart : )
Ok, well about the relationship status..Alex and I decided to end our relationship back in August. Many things had changed and decisions had to be made, and neither of us had peace about continuing on in the relationship, and thus we ended it. Since then, I feel like I have been able to attempt to refocus on my relationship with God. It seemed to have been pushed back a little with my focus being on someone else, but I am trying to getting it back on the Lord. I am thankful for Alex and for what our relationship taught me and how it helped me grow in different areas. So, now I am working on falling more in love with my Savior! It is proving to be difficult, because it seems that my time is so easily filled with other things or other people, so I am trying to be intentional about spending time with Him. Considering He has never put me on the back burner or just pushed me aside, as I do with Him sometimes, I feel like I should be desiring to spend more time with Him. I want to want to desire Him..I want to want to love like Him..I want to have my heart broken by the things that break His heart. I want to want to be so in love with Him! I am on a journey of pursuing Him. (I just recently heard the song 'Hosanna' by Hillsong United for the first time, below are some of lyrics from the chorus..I love this song- it is quite challenging to me..
"Heal my heart and make it clean Open up my eyes to the things unseen Show me how to love like you have loved me Break my heart from what breaks yours Everything I am for your kingdoms cause As I go from nothing to Eternity"
THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE
-I am now just trying to get through December, finish up with school, and looking forward to spending some time with family at Thanksgiving and at Christmas! Although, I know that after December some things in my life will change. In some ways I am quite excited about all the potential changes that lie ahead, yet in some ways I'm a bit anxious, because I have no control over them! I have learned that in life there is no need for me to plan, because when I begin to plan, God changes things! : ) Thus, this time around, I am hoping to just wait on Him and see what doors He is going to open! Although, I know I just said that I am not going to plan..here is what I will probably be doing until He leads me elsewhere.. After I graduate in December, I will extend my apartment lease until June, and my roommate and I will continue to live in Council Bluffs, IA (which is where I have been living since January 2009) I plan to continue to work at HyVee as a manager, and just continue to save money to pay off college loans. Without all of the school workload on me, I may work 2 jobs, just to try to pay off loans faster, but only time will tell! I am kind of looking forward to being able to just save money, versus paying to live...
I do still have thoughts of Mali, West Africa..I do not know what the future holds or what His plans include, or even who they include, but I do know that I want Him to lead me. I was talking to some friends on skype this morning that attended the same language school in France, who work with Campus Crusade for Christ. They just asked me to prayerfully consider joining their team going to the Ivory Coast in August 2010.. I hadn't talked with them in quite awhile, thus them presenting this opportunity kind of made me chuckle..it left me thinking, "Really, God?" So, I do not know what comes next. I will continue to try to lean on Him for everything. I want to pursue His will for my life. I want to lay down all of my desires and just truly and passionately pursue Him. Sometimes, I feel alone..I miss being in a relationship, I miss having someone hold me, I miss feeling special; it creates a desire within me to pursue other relationships, when in reality when the surface of my heart is scraped away, I know that all I need is Jesus. So, this is what I am pursuing now..I am praying to pursue Him and Him ALONE! I am asking Him to help me put all of my desires by the wayside and trust Him. I want to lay down my pride and love those around me with the love He has for me. I want to want Him. I pray that I can begin to see people the way He does, and that that will create within me a desire to serve them and not myself. I want to die to myself and 'do' something for Him. I want to 'be' for Him.
. . . So, there you have it..my life up to date! : ) I hope to keep up with my blog, and will try to be more intentional with it!
